A State Of Panic

AhhHHHHHHHHHHHHH
This hostile nature of mine
I don't know how to stop it
I feel like an explosive, ready to to BOOOOM
I can't survive anymore
I need to rest, lay on a bed and rest my head, my body, my soul
Life life life,
why oh why do you call this life?
Life is meant to be something which keeps you alive,
not what makes you feel dead inside.
STOP
Just listen,
the serenity of the night.
The flow of words springing from my fingertips,
without a thought, just those ideas
flowing, flowing, flowing

(I wrote this poem in November 2017 but never published it because it was too personal and I felt I was just expressing my feelings. However, I now see it as a very interesting piece of writing. At the time I was struggling with my mental health. Thank you for reading.)